Writing. Writing soothes my mind, and calms my soul.
I'm not a good writer, I'm terrible with punctuation and grammar and have lots of run on sentences... But I write what I feel, how can I be bad at that?
Most of you know who I am, and know my story...But for those of you that do not..
I'm Jessica, a 25 year old Military Widow, and mother of an almost 3 week old. I live a nightmare. That's putting it simply.
I lost my husband on August 6, while he was in England on Temporary Duty. He had actually been gone less than 24 hours. I was 33 weeks pregnant, and we were living in Germany stationed at Kapaun Air Station outside of Ramstein.
I flew home to Kentucky at 34 weeks pregnant, and gave birth to our son on September 20th.
I was born in Corbin, Kentucky and raised in Northern Kentucky. I graduated from Boone County High School in 2006.
Met my husband in October 2006.
We began dating on December 5, 2006.
6 months later, we moved to North Carolina to live with his dad. It was short lived as his mother in KY was terminally ill & Ryan wanted to be with her.
December 5, 2007, Ryan proposed. Of course I said yes!
Ryan's mother passed away in November 2008, and threw Ryan for a whirl. He went through months of not knowing what he wanted in life, what he wanted with me, just months of so much unknown. His mother, Karen, had talked to him about joining the military. Eventually, he started bringing it up to me. He had weight to lose. He had time. In 1 years time, he did amazing on his ASVAB test, lost the 60+ lbs he needed to lose, worked full time, and enlisted.
We married on December 5, 2009.
Ryan left for basic training for the Air Force in January 2010.
May 2010 I moved to Wichita Falls, Texas to be with Ryan while he completed Tech School.
August 2010, we held our wedding ceremony and completed our first military move to Offutt AFB, Nebraska.
October 2012, we moved to Germany for a 4 year tour.
August 2013, tragedy strikes.
& so this is life...
Writing does soothe the soul. When I was in high school I was really angry on the inside and used to sit up at night and write hateful poetry and journal entries, reading them now is interesting to see what was going on in my mind then...vs. now. I hope you can find some peace in any way that you can. LOVE you, cousin :) - Laura
ReplyDeleteI love you Jessica! Your blog is great! I think you're a terrific writer with oh so much to say! Let it flow girlfriend!
ReplyDeleteI knew your husband's mother, but didn't realize this till just recently. She was friends with my older sisters growing up. I know Holly from going to church with her parents (and of course her). I just wanted to say that while I didn't know your husband, or you, I'm very sorry for your loss. I cannot begin to imagine. I'm glad you find comfort in writing, it can be very therapeutic. Take comfort in that beautiful baby. He'll give you reason to get out of the bed in the mornings. Praying God's richest blessings for you and your son.
ReplyDeleteI love this and can't wait to hear what else running through your mind girl<3 -Angelika
ReplyDeleteWriting has been my therapy. Dont worry too much about punctuation. Just let it all come out--let it just flow. This, by the way, was beautifully written. And i am so sorry that you have endure such---pain. I wish i knew the right thing to say that would help make things better, but I really dont. All I can do is keep you in my thoughts and prayers and be here if you need, even though you don't know me from a can of paint.
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